Sunday, December 4, 2011

One Year Ago

The last time I saw my dad alive was at the hospital. The nurse called me early in the morning and told me to come say good-bye but that I could take my time but that it would be today. I took my time and about two hours later she called to tell me to come now.

I hung out just talking to him as he laid there loaded with morphine with a machine breathing for him for about 2 more hours. Finally I left because I knew what he was doing. He was refusing to die in front of me.

I was right. It took me about 45 minutes to get home from the hospital and the second I walked in the door his doctor called me to tell me they did everything they could but he was gone.

Having two parents die 7 weeks apart is tough. You do things that you never thought you'd have to do. I had to call a funeral home, get them cremated, pick up their ashes in simple cardboard boxes since I couldn't afford anything else (they're still in those boxes, in my closet), then I had to plan their funeral, a joint funeral for my parents...

Me and dad at Disneyland in CA:

Me and dad about 4 or 5 years ago (this is at our first apartment):

Me and dad, I'm about 2 here:

Dad first meeting Annika:

Dad reading to Annika:

1 comment:

  1. I bet the holidays are hard. I know you must miss them both terribly. Just hug your beautiful daughter tight and think of all the happy times. And if you need to cry, do it. Thinking of you.